Stop at the end.

NEW USERNAME!!

Fri, 04 Jul 2008 04:49:32 GMT

i am officially abandoning this journal because i hate the name.
i can now be found at oh_soleil

add me :)

Thu, 03 Jul 2008 07:46:14 GMT

i cried watching a movie today. not from sorrow, not from fear. no, these were tears of absolute shock and awe.
i was sitting alone in the living room watching one hour photo and there's a really graphic scene involving robin william's eyes.
i literally burst into tears and sat there shaking, unblinking, for the next two full minutes. it was awful.

in other news, i'm feeling great lately.
one thing somewhat concerns me, though, my body seems to be changing its natural habits. i've been doing absolutely nothing in my spare time except cooking and cleaning. i've even had a couple dreams that i've had kids.
whatever brought on this domestic turn of events needs to go from whence it came, i'm fucking sick of acting like a mom.

working the fourth of july, not terribly upset about it. i'll be out of there at five, my insane manager isn't working, and i'm getting time and a half for it.

i also watched the original version of pulse (the japanese one) and it was quite scary.
needless to say, many a ball was tripped today.

i've been writing a LOT lately. nothing is going anywhere, but it feels great to have pen actually connect to paper for once on something that i don't have to hand in.

i found out that my manager has been writing me up late every single time i come in AT 9:00 on the dot, when my shift does in fact start at nine so that shouldn't be a problem. whatever, she's being unreasonable, all the more reason for me to find a new job.

this is all i want right now.

obviously minus the heroin-induced stupor, but you get the point.

bedtime, goodnight.

si vis amari, ama.
(to be loved, love)

Wed, 02 Jul 2008 14:51:26 GMT

we live and die and anything else is just delusion.

Tue, 01 Jul 2008 13:51:25 GMT

your handwriting. the way you walk. which china pattern you choose. it's all giving you away.
everything you do shows your hand. everything is a self-portrait. everything is a diary.

Mon, 30 Jun 2008 22:35:06 GMT

it's only in drugs or death that we experience anything new
and death is just too controlling.

Mon, 30 Jun 2008 01:39:58 GMT

make me into anything,
just love me

Sun, 29 Jun 2008 04:13:02 GMT

unbeingdead isn't beingalive.

Fri, 27 Jun 2008 14:19:53 GMT

i've been asking myself a lot of questions lately about how i'm living and where i'm going to end up, and i think i'm finally on the right path.
i'm completely happy.
i'm being more responsible.
i'm taking care of myself along with the other people i usually involve myself with.
i know what i want to do and where i want to go.
i'm starting to have trouble saying no, but it's working out so far because everything i've said yes to has turned out for the better.
i feel like i'm finally living. life is so beautiful.

in other news!
[+] football game with mom and taylor tonight! i get to watch the north kingstown police department play the patriots, hahahah.
[-] sophie ate my favorite pair of gap sweatpants! they were way overpriced and i'm completely devastated by the loss.
[-] eating said pair of pants resulted in sophie waking up at 2:30am and puking all over the living room.
[? ] dad and whitney get back today. i'm not sure how i feel about that.
[-] i was going to clean the house for their return but i don't know where anything goes, so i'm pretty much just going to leave everything exactly where it was when i arrived here on monday.
[+] i've lost seven pounds in the past week!
[-] i have to go to benny's today to get my new work schedule and talk to my manager about my vacation time. she is not going to be thrilled.
[+} OH YEAH. i'm going on vacation! i took off july 27th to august 9th and i'll be visiting rachel in texas and aïda in virginia.
[+] i have some really neat ideas for my new tattoo, which i will be getting with rachel while visiting her next month (!!). i'm most likely going to get a quote or lyric somewhere. i'm thinking about either a rib tattoo or on my back, centered between my shoulder blades, but not low enough to be a tramp stamp. i might post my options on here once i narrow it down a bit more, i currently have five pages of quotes and lyrics i like that i need to weed through. in related news, i'm going to post a quote here every day even if i don't have anything else to say. hope you enjoy them as much as i do!
[-} i need to get off the computer and go take care of the dogs. maybe that's a positive thing, really. i spend WAY too much time on here.

arrivederci.

what we call chaos is just patterns
we haven't recognized yet.

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 20:45:22 GMT

i look like i was hit by a bus but i feel like i'm flying above it all.

yeahhhhhh

^___________________________________^

Tue, 24 Jun 2008 18:32:58 GMT

THIS IS THE BEST WEEK EVER.
LIKE ON VH1, BUT ACTUALLY NOT SHITTY AND WITH FUNNY MOMENTS.

I LOVE MY LIFE.

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 21:40:38 GMT

i had the most fantastic evening yesterday. ahhhhhhh :D

i think i'm better off if i don't talk about it but i'm just going to say that i am so happy right now! :D

i hope everyone is well!

Sun, 22 Jun 2008 21:34:54 GMT

FUCKING PUMPED.

biggest waste of space ever, shit yes.
today is a fantastic fucking day.

Sat, 21 Jun 2008 12:25:45 GMT

[+] i bought my first expensive pair of jeans yesterday. seventy bucks at express. i also bought some cute dresses. i love having graduation money.
[-] my back is really messed up. i don't know what i did to it, but if i stand up straight, it hurts. if i do anything other than sit down and slouch, it hurts, actually. i should probably call the doctor, but eh. i don't want to go there and have them torture me for awhile and take some x-rays and then tell me that they can't find anything wrong, because that's what always happens.
[-] i have to work 9-5 today, lame. at least my manager is still on vacation. she should do this more often.
[+] cookout at hoffer's later! i have to come home and make brownies after work, i know heads will roll if i show up at his house without anything to eat.
[-] i'm immune to advil, tylenol, motrin... really anything less potent than percocet, so i'm doomed to spend the entire day with a backache and a headache. heaven help me.

hope y'all are enjoying your respective summers, and all that jazz.

movie reviews, in five words or less.

Wed, 18 Jun 2008 13:58:49 GMT

the happening: completely horrible.
iron man: boner-inspiring and fantastic.
indiana jones 4: legit worst movie ever.
the strangers: balls scary, very good.

i only wanted to do current ones. this actually started out as a rant about how bad the happening was but then i felt the need to warn against the fourth indiana jones flick as well, so i decided to do that and then recommend some alternatives to seeing either one of those.

i had really vivid dreams last night and i woke up feeling stressed out and sad. i really need this weekend to show up.

i think i'm gonna do some job-hunting today. (i say that now, but i'm sure i won't end up doing it.)
ahhh well.

oh, i forgot to tell you

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 20:34:04 GMT

attention, livejournal!

i got into ric as last-minute as possible.
i am completely fucking unstoppable.

eat my ass, high school. college, here i come!

BALLS.

Thu, 12 Jun 2008 14:40:41 GMT

i'm unnecessarily bummed out about nothing specific.
my day is going to consist of laying in my front yard working on my tan (don't laugh. i was out there for forty minutes yesterday and i'm already two shades darker, so eat me), getting a haircut to ward off the impending matthew mcconaughey disaster, running to starbucks because i am a complete tool, working out so i can actually visit the beach without scaring children, and absolutely nothing else.
my plans keep getting hugely fucked up and i'm really disappointed by that.
sigh.
i should just take a nap until saturday morning.

whoa, fuck that emo shit! i found some srs bsns i need to attend to.
i wish i could post this entry directly into the brains of everyone everywhere, because i NEED TO GET THE WORD OUT.

the following errors need to be corrected and never made again, from here on out:
- conversate is not a fucking word. the verb is converse. dear jesus christ, is it REALLY that difficult?!
- learn the difference between its and it's. its not a nice day out, it's a nice day out. COME ONNNN.
- same with your and you're, with they're and their and there. need an example? there is a difference between their haircuts, but they're still twins. get it? got it? good.
- uh, stop abbreviating words that are under five letters long to begin with. U LUK s0o0 gud, bb.
that may be the case, but your sentence doesn't. shut up.
- i may not be one to judge in the case of capitalization, but i still feel the need to yell at people who capitalize every word in a sentence. Your Sentence Looks Awkward Like This, Not All Of These Words Are Proper Nouns. In Fact, None Of Them Are. KNOCK IT OFF.
- this one really drives me batshit. you're not writing a handwritten letter, you're typing something out. if you make a spelling mistake, you don't even have to erase to get back to where you were. JUST FUCKING GO BACK AND FIX IT. even if you're completely incapable of spelling anything right, download firefox. it's free, it's an awesome browser, and it comes with FREE SPELL CHECK AS YOU TYPE.
- coming is spelled with one m. not two.
- numbers zero through ten should be written out. you don't need to put a 2 when you can just write out two. i swear i'm not making this up, it's in the textbooks.
- definitely is really not a difficult word. there is no a anywhere in it, so stop putting one in there.
- it's unnecessary for you to drag out the last letter of any word, ever. it doesn't add anything to the sentence and it makes you look like a big honkin' queer. TOTALLYYYYYYYY just looks really douchey, yes?
- use an apostrophe when you need one, and don't need one when you don't. you're not safe just throwing them in willy-nilly, and you're not safe abstaining from using them at all. learn the rules, i promise they're really not all that difficult. dont is incorrect, as is your's.

i think that's all for now, though i'll add to this if anything else pops up.

DID YOU KNOW

Tue, 10 Jun 2008 02:27:07 GMT

you can get a UTI if you don't take a piss after you have sex?

i missed out on that bulletin! and no, i don't have one, kayla just informed me. but damn, girl, how much does that blow?!

AMIRITE?!

Fri, 06 Jun 2008 16:17:00 GMT

i was looking up lil wayne lyrics earlier and came across this.

i lol'd for an eon.

Thu, 05 Jun 2008 19:47:46 GMT

my tonsils are fucked, i'm going to the doctor right now to see what's up.
UGH, seriously.

Wed, 04 Jun 2008 16:07:38 GMT

i have officially decided that the movie "the pursuit of happyness" is the exact same thing as "run lola run," they just replaced the girl with a bad dye job with will smith.

runrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrun.

Wed, 04 Jun 2008 13:23:44 GMT

happy last day of classes, everyone!! i just presented my last high school project ever and cleaned out my locker for the first time and had my last class with tony martinez.

this shit's really scary when you think about it.
whatever. :D

wonderful week and weekend ahead.
i am so happy.

AND I CAN'T WAIT TO MOVE OUT INTO MY OWN PLACE OMG OMG.

Tue, 03 Jun 2008 19:04:30 GMT

I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT I GOT AN APARTMENT EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

life is fucking fantastic, of course.

last day two ever. no more ap stats ever again!!
no more anatomy!
NO MORE FUCKING GERMAN!!!!

AHHHHHHH LIFE COULD NOT BE BETTER.

yessss.

Thu, 29 May 2008 02:26:41 GMT

:D

i had a good day today and bought a beautiful dress and i'm going to see a movie tomorrow and other things and life is wonderful.

Wed, 21 May 2008 18:55:33 GMT

my presentation was PERFECT.

it was almost exactly ten minutes, slightly longer.
i wrote the index cards out while i was waiting for the person ahead of me to finish.
i had so much more to say than i thought i did.

i'm so glad i didn't write out a whole speech, that's so confining.

IT IS OVER. YES.

LIFE IS SO GOOD. :D

updates, pos vs. neg

Mon, 28 Apr 2008 01:40:49 GMT

[-] my car died today! :(
[+] it was just a dead battery.
[+] it died after i made it to work.
[+] i work at a car place, so everything was fixed before i had to leave for the day.
[+] i went out to starbucks and dinner with ally doyle.
[-] i still didn't get to see leah this weekend.
[+] i have very few plans this week so i can hopefully see her sometime soon.
[+] i'm "sleeping over kayla's" on saturday, which is superb.

i started this day off in such a shitty mood because of my car, but i'm ending it on such a positive note that i'm actually looking forward to living through this week.
you know life is good when you're excited to wake up and see what every day brings.

this was on postsecret this week. i think it's amazing.

i am euphoria incarnate. ♥